Sunday, January 22, 2006

Why Shouldn't We Have Our Own Dog Blogs?

What's the problem? Why do the editors of this blog call it a coup? After all, it's called Shelterdog Blog. So why not let the shelterdogs contribute to it? After all, some of us are sensitive, self-absorbed songwriters, too. And some of our songs are even less boring than those of our People. Here's a snippet of one of mine:

I’m just a poor shelterdog
‘Cause the people make me sleep on the floor
If I slept upon the bed I’d be happy, but instead
They put me out, then they’re closing the door.
This old, moldy basket, that I never asked for
It’s only a typical ruse
It don’t have no box spring, no pillow, no people
So I’ve got the shelterdog blues.

Now, I know it's not perfect grammer. But I didn't get a very good education at the shelter. And there are a lot of people who went to school that use grammar just as bad as mine. And, if you think I'm just some ignorant shelter dog, you should read the interview I gave (with Watson, that narcissistic mutt whose blog submission is directly below and who instigated this takeover) at such an esteemed publication as
Harvard Magazine. We're actually a lot smarter and more articulate than the People give us credit for.

Saturday, January 21, 2006

Dog-coup at Shelterdog Blog

Blah blah blah. I'm a sensitive, introspective singer songwriter, singing about my feelings. BLECCCH!

I couldn't stand it anymore, so in the words of that old political dog, General Alexander Haig, I'm in charge, now.

Call it a coup, call me a dog, but I'm a lot more in touch with my feelings than you singer-songwriters.

Feelings are very simple, really. I want to go to the lake. I want to chase the squirrels. I want to chase the chipmunks. I want to smell the rotten log. I don't like the cat. Food is good. I don't like going to the vet. I do like the park. Feelings.

But I have nothing against music, as long as it's good. So, in the spirit of these people who call themselves singer-songwriters, here's one of my own:

I'm a blue yellow lab.
Them blues have got me down
I'm a blue yellow lab
Them blues have got me down
'Cause my low-down "owners"
Won't let me run all over town.

Now that's a song! Who ever said songer-songwriters have to be people, anyway? Probably people, that's who.

So from here on out, this is OUR blog. After all, the people guy called it the "Shelterdog Blog." What did he expect?